Hey love!

I'm loresha

Early Childhood Educator Certified Intentional Living Coach

I also answer to...

Bae

After being married for 11 years {before healing was the most talked about thing in our culture), there was us and the broken pieces we crawled into our marriage with.

Ma

Bio, bonus, sports, spilled residue, blended, miscarriages, depression, 2 teenagers, 2 preteens, Asperger's, prematurity, and piles of undone laundry sums up my journey.

The call of entrepreneurship

And all that comes with it. With 5 years of full time entrepreneurial lessons in my tote bag, this is more of a faith walk rather than a vision board.

But don't let the titles fool you...

I'm no different than you

While faith filled and intentional, I’m not one of those holier than thou supermoms. I don’t bake cookies every day or have a cute snack waiting on the dining room table after school (it’s a win if I remembered to take what we’re having for dinner out of the freezer). So if you’re looking for religious traditions or unrealistic lunch ideas that involve star-shaped fruit, I’m not ya girl.

Yes, “I Luh God” in the words of my girl Erica Campbell. But I also love white wine, 90’s Hip-Hop & RnB and have no problem skipping Easter Sunday traditions so hubby & I can take the kids to a water park. 

I’m still human so that means I’m not perfect. I’m unlearning stuff everyday and I might cuss at my children when they’re not listening. While that may disqualify me as the poster child for Christianity (which is a title I proudly don’t want), I’m also building new bridges of generational growth and healing along the way.

I don’t know about you, but the boxes that society teaches women they have to fit inside the confines and limitations of have me exhausted.

So, a few years ago, I decided to quit. 

Quit pretending that I was fine while carrying the weight of my obstacles and the need to be superwoman. I decided to quit being stuck in survival mode and start living the life I was created for.

Now I’m on the lifelong journey of intention, ease and abundance that already has my name written on it.

How I got here

Now this is a story all about how my life got flipped turned upside down...

So you know how some people have really cool stories about how they created their business or found their purpose? Yeah well, that’s not me. My purpose was found in my pain (which used to be the name of this blog and podcast). It wasn’t until I grew exhausted of hearing the only three words that sound like nails on a chalkboard to me, that I decided to trust God and intentionally pursue my purpose. The 3 words?

GET OVER IT.

Just typing those words makes my skin crawl.

After infidelity shook my new marriage like an unexpected hurricane that you didn’t know you were suppose to prepare for, I found myself stuck in an overwhelming, never ending cycle of depression, anxiety and toxic behavior, for years. I started falling behind in my dreams and goals, and no longer recognized myself. I don’t know what was worse…my attitude towards everyone and the way I would cut people with my words, the emotionally absent mother I had become to my children or the fact that I wanted to stay in the comfort of my dysfunction because uncertainty was too scary to face.

Whatever it was, I was a hot mess. And if that wasn’t enough, I was stressing myself out trying to “keep up” with society’s image of still being the perfect wife and mother while keeping up the appearance that everything was fine.

But I was secretly dying inside. No one but my husband and I knew what was going on and I was okay with putting on my “I’m fine” mask every time I stepped outside because I didn’t want to hear other people’s opinions, judgement, phony remarks or the “get over it’s.” I was trying to pull myself out of quicksand with no help (hubby tried to help on numerous occasions, but he was the last person I wanted help from. Besides how can the thing that hurt you, heal you?). I was trying to parent through my pain (I was a single parent as far as I was concerned) and maintain my own sanity the best way I knew how; doing everything myself, faking it until I made it and staying busy.

While I still held the “traditional titles” that keep most women busy, such as mom and wife, I was also:

  • A Student- I was a full-time student (a combination of online and classroom learning), pursuing my passion of entrepreneurship and opening a childcare facility. A dream that I thought had a died, right along with my marriage.
 
  • A Full time Nurse– I went from my long term nursing job to a direct care nurse for a special needs child, a nurse liaison for a healthcare company with 4 major hospitals as my key accounts and an admissions/marketing director at a VERY demanding Rehabilitation Center/ Assisted Living facility. (I also worked at my kid’s old daycare on my off days…don’t ask).
 
  • “That mom”– Yes… although laser focused on my dreams and emotionally absent in private, I was still “that mom” in public. I was the mom who no matter what was going on at my kid’s school, you always saw me. I was the PTA Treasurer (even after my daughters went off to private school), volunteered for ALL the field trips, spoke at the kindergarten orientation, served the teachers on teacher appreciation day, bought the Popsicles for field day and served hot dogs at the ice cream social.
 
This charade went on for almost 3 years

So I practiced self-care...not the real kind, just society's version.

I looked out for me. I went after my dream of being a childcare owner, got more certifications and degrees and was determined to make myself happy.

But it wasn’t until I looked up in 2015, that I realized I was busy and unfulfilled. I had the credentials to get started, was watching kids from my home in the evening but still felt empty. I was so focused on my “purpose” that I was running away from the one thing I didn’t want to, but needed to face; why my marriage experienced infidelity in the first place. The truth was I wasn’t busy at all. 

I WAS JUST PRIORITIZING THE MESS OVER THE MESSAGE

See when hubby and I first met, I was on fire for God, my dreams and life. But over the years of “being in love”, that fire wasn’t even enough to light a candle. I had subconsciously allowed my husband to sit on the throne that was only reserved for God. Not because he asked me to, but because in my 20+ years of a dysfunctional mindset, I had finally found someone who was going to love me for me, unconditionally. Little did I know at the time, I had already found that person in God.

But when infidelity hit, I decided that I no longer wanted to be a “religion addict” (someone who just gets “high” off the word on Sundays, then turns around and acts a fool Monday- Saturday) even though that was all I knew. My life had always been filled with “religious people”, and I was tired of the façade. You know, those scripture quoting, Spirit-filled, serving in every ministry while in church, hypocritical people who care more about your outfit then your soul, don’t practice what they preach, but judge others for some of the same sins that they commit in private? Yeah, those people. I was ready to know and experience God for myself, not just feel good for a couple of hours.

Not wanting to live the rest of my life running from my issues or pass down my dysfunctional generational mindset to my kids, I started pursuing avenues that I thought would be the best option for my family and I. After multiple failed attempts of doing things my way, I ended up taking an avenue I had once abandoned; church. If you read Freedom, How Goal Setting Saved My Life then you know I never really had a relationship with God for myself. 

So I stepped out of the religion box and started building a REALATIONSHIP with God (yes I spelled it wrong on purpose). My family and I found a new church home, I started praying, self-reflecting, and carefully examining my own failed attempts at life. It was during my heart work that God gave me a word that helped me transform the narrative of my life and the lives of my family; become intentional and restore order.

I wish I could say I did everything God told me to do and we lived happily ever after. But this isn’t a fairy tale and my life is far from perfect.

Besides, you don't inspire others by being perfect. You inspire them by how you deal with your imperfections.

See making the decision to be intentional is the easy part, but actually executing and being consistent is where things get difficult. When you go from doing things your way to following another set of rules, it can be hard to stay consistent. Even if the person telling you to do it is God. But you have to stick with it because your reward is in your obedience. I was still extremely head strong (I come from a long line of these type of women) and thought that some of my plans were better than Gods. LOL He quickly shut that down and made me realize that when I still did things my way, I was going to fail. Period. 

Whether I would excel in one area and slack in another, something wasn’t going to go according to what I thought the plan should be. So I grew desperate and knew I had to do something different and quick. So I took the word God gave me and started with myself.

That journey was the beginning of Mrs. Intentional. What I thought was just a deep dive into the root of my marital issues, was actually the propelling force behind shifting the narrative of my legacy, discovering my God given purpose and making an impact in the transformation of generations to come.

 

Where I'm Headed

Fast forward to today and my obedience has allowed me the opportunity to not only renew, rebuild and restore my life, but to operate in the beginning of my dream as a childcare owner. 

My obedience has allowed me to go beyond the classroom and discover my God given purpose of enriching the lives of children by enriching their environments and the influential people in them.

It’s created a strong desire in me to inspire, strengthen and equip women of God who are called to be change agents, visionaries and industry disruptors, to take intentional action towards their purpose, goals and the abundant life that’s waiting on the other side of their pain and adversity.

And I’m not stopping until every woman, child and family assigned to me is thriving in intention.